I can't remember the last time I went to church consistently.
Yep, I am a huge church-compliance failure. I have tried out no less than 10 churches in the Baltimore area in my 11 years of living here, and have yet to settle on one that fulfills my needs. Every Sunday I set my alarm to get up and go to a church (ANY CHURCH!) and every Sunday, I turn off the alarm and roll over to return to my pleasant slumber. I know I should go to church - I certainly believe it is an important part of being a Christian, and yet, I do not go. So, I give people the impression that I am a church-going girl, but mostly that is just me being a tremendous actress.
So here's the scoop; I LOVE Jesus, I BELIEVE that He wants me to be apart of a body of believers, I DON'T feel particularly inclined to make that happen.
I used to love church, I loved the music, the sermons, the fellowship, the Holy Spirit moving within the body - I couldn't get enough! At the end of high school I was there every time the doors were open, I cried if I had to miss youth group, and it wasn't just about being with my friends, it was about being with the Holy Spirit. What in the world changed?
I pretty much figure I am all alone in this because only heathens would avoid church when they know that they should be going. And then I stumbled upon a very interesting article in a fabulous magazine - Relevant, entitled "The Vanishing Church Body." Turns out that I am not the only one who is not so much impressed with the traditional church these days.
"If they aren't bored to death by church, many young people simply find it to be irrelevant to their life or the concerns of the culture"
Case in point - I have a history of depression - the church does not get it, and has told me over and over just to pray it away. Umm... sometimes people get cancer and God doesn't heal that, so what if I am meant to live a life afflicted with depression? How about some compassion and support?
Why don't you talk about the hard issues like how I am supposed to reconcile a belief in the word of God and the church telling me homosexuality is a sin, but having close friends who identify themselves as gay? I have friends who love God but have to avoid the church because Christians are hating on their orientation - teach me to help them!
Also, why does every sermon have to be about married people with kids. I am not married, I do not have kids - I need a teacher who is willing to acknowledge that not everyone in the body has the same single family home and 2.5 kids with a dog. I often feel like the sermon is geared to those folks, not me.
I guess my dirty little secret is out, and I am sure I will be judged for failing to be the perfect Christian, but I have felt ignored by the church sometimes, and no one seems to miss me when I'm not there - which makes it much easier to roll over and go back to sleep.
There might be more on this - if you can stand it! ~ Lindsay
Is this was a facebook post, I would "like" it. I agree with alot of the stuff you've said. I wish I had an answer, but I don't. I live within 6 blocks of like, 9 churches. I've gone to all of them... I don't really "feel" any of them. I don't know if it's me or what, but... I get you.
ReplyDeleteFunny - we recently left a church called Mosaic because they were not family focused in the least. This would be a great church for you, if it weren't 3000 miles away. The pastor vocally welcomes everyone: atheists, muslims, bhuddists, homosexuals, liars, celebrities, whatever. He really tackles the tough issues - his sermon on paranormal activity was awesome! The main demographic of the church is single people in thier 20s and 30s. We loved all of this, but had to leave because they didn't really have a sunday school program. All this to say, that churches you're looking for DO exisit, so don't give up. And in the meantime, you can check out the Mosaic church podcasts. Also, I love you dear friend, and think of you often!
ReplyDeleteI honestly feel like every sermon is the same now. I haven't heard anything new or refreshing.
ReplyDeleteI find church completely obsolete (in my life right now). I know if I ever have a family one day I would like to raise them until they feel they are old enough to make the decision to go or not to go anymore.
Plus, church was stuffed down my throat 4 times a week and I'm still recovering...